exhausted mind

sometimes feel its my fault. everything that happened is my fault.

I’m not your kind of worthy friend that people will fight for.

Maybe should really leave on my own.

And the best part, no one would ever realise that.

Inspirational captain

Came across one of my friend’s facebook.

Inspires me alot. How could one be so positive about everything? Like real positive.
He must have gone through real much to have achieved so much today.
Lesson learnt(like i always say): never judge someone when you barely know him/her. He chooses what to show you.

Inspirational enough.

I always try to be one of those ‘the cup is half-full’ . But deep inside what i really feel ..’the cup is half-empty’. I always try to be positive but it was never the case. Pessimistic.

Then one day during dinner, my friend asked me.. “Babe, whats wrong with you nowadays? Do you know that you have to be happy about yourself before you can make people around you happy.”

Sadly most of the time, i don’t feel good about life or myself. Okay i’ll feel happy from time to time. But whenever i’m alone, busride alone, at night esp,, thoughts come flowing in. Stuffs like ‘am i ever important to anyone? Or burden?’ Its my insecurities that kills me most of the time.

thankful.

I was just wondering what if we all died the next moment..Am I gonna regret things that I never said before?

So this goes..

 

To my dear trios,

It’s been all good memories with you girls throughout my poly years and really are the only ones in poly that i feel our friendship will carry on till idk when. Wasn’t smooth sailing during the second year when i drifted away, when we would just ignore each other’s existence in school. But i’m really glad that we’re back this time, stronger. I don’t know what I can do to make it up to you but I just hope that we’ll all be happy together in the future days to come. 

 

To G.PKL / J.TSC,

For being honest to me, I’m thankful cause at least you cared to even come and ask me what happened, ask me out to know what’s wrong. Thank you for being there when I cried my eyes out even though you were tired/sick/had school & work the next morning. Knowing that you were all tired, you girls still insisted on accompanying me till i felt better to go home. Grateful. Please stay in good health !

 

To Y.

Shit do happen TWICE. Once was accidental, while second was stupid. Explaining so much now doesn’t really help to salvage any of these anymore. This time maybe it’s really through. All these years no doubt really went down the drain. No turning point. You’d probably hate me to the core now but still thankful for all those great moments together(e.g. The Hk trip, Xmas & etc). Wish you all the best in your career and to the international platform in future.
(find this fake or what, I’m just saying what I really feel) 

 


M.